World First! Bike Flip on a Moving Train: “Red Bull makes you crazy” is the subtext for me.

That self-appendectomy: you’re the only doctor on station in the Antarctic and your appendix bursts, what do you do? Click through if you want to see for yourself.

How I Made $7 Selling Books: it’s a little long at one page as the title itself gives away the plot.

RedBull Airborne Skate Park: I guess?

‘Gorilla Glue girl’ Tessica Brown now has a full-time agent: oh, she’s not going to sue her way into riches—companies are going to pay her for her audience. I foresee future viral videos of her confusing tar for her mascara or a TidePod for some candy.

GORILLA GLUE HAIRDO
– I STILL CAN’T GET THIS GLUE OUT AFTER ER!!! – Might Be Time to Sue: this cannot result in a settlement. This cannot result in a settlement.

The Dream of the Fisherman’s Wife: the same guy who did The Wave also painted this in 1814.

Was a $280 million emerald destroyed in California wildfire? PG&E is dubious: and they are right to be!

Urban BASEjumping – Fifty In Five: what would possess someone to do this? Look at all the close calls with street poles, for starters. Just do drugs, for crying out loud.

The Latest Private Jet Amenity Is a Theme Party for Your Children: for when iPads have lost their luster, I suppose. I am trying to not reflexively balk, but it’s tough.

A Russian Oligarch’s $500 Million Yacht Is in the Middle of Britain’s Costliest Divorce: that is a nice ship. The crew is always the one that suffers in a divorce.

Injuries at annual cheese-rolling contest in UK: this is such a ludicrous event—and it’s apparently been going on for centuries. Google Street View goes to the top of Cooper’s Hill.

Mothers Day: so disgusting and needlessly divisive.

Snooty dog owners hijacked NYC park for ‘private’ kennel club: New York values run up against New York values.

United States Returns Thousands of Ancient Artifacts To Iraq: the other important Hobby Lobby case.

Sorry but someone has to say it – Chip and Joanna Gaines do NOT put family first: I, too, don’t see how they can do all the things they do and prioritize family. I suppose we’ll have to wait for their children’s tell-all books to find out for sure.

Buy Elon Musk a Couch: has raised ~6x goal in two days to buy furniture for a billionaire. (I’m not normally judgmental about how people spend their money, but come on!)

Montville Schools’ Failure To Report ‘Fight Club’ Activity ‘Egregious’: in his defense, the teacher didn’t leave a sub plan for him to follow.

Scott Frederick Wegener charged with making, blowing up improvised explosive devices in Fort Pierce: to be fair, the neighbor did steal his BB gun. Who wouldn’t make an IED to put under the thief’s house or at least try to blow up his chickens.

Items Found During #WeaponSweep: look at all the rope that can’t get cut now thanks to the London police. Phew! (In other news: if you may have committed a crime, manage to escape, and are close enough, they can now spray you so they can maybe find you later.)

In Ethiopia, A New Ban On Foreign Adoptions Is About National Pride: this is quite troubling. Who cares if the children are condemned to a life of orphanages or abandonment, they must stay put.

David Hogg Goes Wild: such a coarsening of the public discourse. This is emotional, demagogic populism—sadly, he’s going to be with us for a long time.

It’s a JOKE!: excellent take on the British travesty. (Lots of warranted cursing.) {via}

Exchange students in Italy set fire by cooking pasta without water: 20-years old is an adult. How do you go through life that long without knowing that pasta is cooked in a microwave?! Geesh. {via}

450 W Grixdale, Detroit, MI 48203: ornate doesn’t even begin to describe this listing. {via}

Painful new engagement ring piercing trend growing in popularity: is there no limit to the efforts to stand out amongst the crowd?

The Politicization of the FBI: outstanding overview of the situation from a very-experienced source.

Fresh Prints of Bills Here: oh my. No. Uh uh.

Student investigated after allegedly saying a math symbol looked: zero tolerance for saying the g-word. The authorities searched his home and decided against criminal charges for the observation, but he may still face discipline at the school. (I know it’s different city and a different agency, but this got investigated thoroughly while actual threats were passed over?!)

Jamison Bachman, the Worst Roommate Ever: the range of people in this world will always surprise me.

China wages war on funeral strippers: that’s just weird. Imagine the first family that did this, before it caught on. Awkward!

Plyscraper city – Tokyo to build 350m tower made of wood: I don’t get the impetus behind this at all. What’s wrong with steel?

Passengers Recall ‘Flight From Hell’ After 3-Year-Old Screamed for 8 Hours Straight: I’m surprised no one on board was arrested. I can’t even imagine but I can easily believe it.

Facing the Death Penalty With a Disloyal Lawyer: this is a travesty and I don’t understand how his attorney isn’t facing ethics charges or disbarment. Oyez has more.

The #MeToo era is making dating more confusing: my favorite was the line “men have the power in courtship.” A backlash is surely coming.

‘Super blue blood moon’ leaves Venetian gondolas stranded on dried-up canal banks: it looks so eerie. Poor Venetians have to walk like those Florentine suckers.

The #MeToo-Fueled Character Assassination of Nolan Bushnell: Brianna Wu is a menace. Her and her ilk want to turn every award into a Woke Award (In Some Category). It’s a social media pitchfork mob.

Live Views of Starman: something about this whole stunt just rubs me the wrong way. The attention whoring? The precious details that put it over the top? The possibility that somehow taxpayers are paying for this malarkey?

‘Emotional support peacock’ barred from United Airlines plane: this is blatant avian discrimination. What is wrong with people!

ACLU – Trump’s America is Exclusionary: this is not a winning strategy for them.

After Building New AU Headquarters, China Spies on Addis Ababa Facility: if you’re not paying for something, then you’re the product being sold. {via}

Woman Takes Service Turkey on Flight for Trip to Scatter Husband’s Ashes: no one sat next to this lady?! Hard to believe. It’s just a matter of time before someone brings some motherf’ing emotional support snakes on the plane.

Nutella ‘riots’ spread across French supermarkets: looks like the desire for a good deal isn’t limited to ugly, fat Americans, eh?

Patent US1926420 – Combined racing greyhound harness and rider supporting means: the 30s, what an era! Look at the first image. {via}

The Humanity Star: it’s a disco ball. The only wonder it evokes in me is “were taxes used for this?” (Though the discussion on Hacker News did lead me to learn about the “Free Taco” contest during Mir’s reentry, so it’s not a total loss.) {via}

Dutch police to ‘undress’ youths wearing clothes deemed too expensive for them: heaven forbid you store a cookie when visiting a Web site without consent. Europe. {via}

What Is NASA’s Asteroid Redirect Mission?: time will tell but I worry that the answer is “the cause of earth’s second mass extinction event.”

Police union slashes number of ‘get out of jail free’ cards issued: normally you’d have to be a diplomat to get that kind of discretionary courtesy. More context here.

Cops searching for suspect with Social Security face tattoo: it does make filling out a job application easier.

Death of Man in Skyscraper Fall in China Puts a Spotlight on ‘Rooftopping’: it’s unfortunate but inevitable. I hope people stop doing this.

Netflix Genre List: tens of thousands of genres, including Goofy Deep Sea Movies. {via}

Pen-Pineapple-Apple-Pen/PIKO-TARO: 80 million views. 80 million.

FlossTime: a smart floss dispenser that 20x as expensive (or more if you just use what your dentist gives you). Just one more thing to make you feel bad when you’re looking at the mirror.

Ukulele Batman Vs. Bagpipe Superman – Theme Song Battle: whoa. {via}

China’s Enormous Derelict Shopping Mall Does Not Bode Well For Humanity’s Future: wow, that’s such a waste.

The World’s First Underwater Tennis Court Could Cost $2.5 Billion: no amount of assurances would convince me to be a spectator there.

flatev: Keurig for tortillas. Only $290 plus 90¢ per tortilla. Sigh.

Caminito del Rey: holy crap. And I thought that trail in China was death-defying! As scary as it is (boy howdy is it scary!), the sobering thought is that people built this in the first place.

Copter Mommy: sad and true. {via}

Squatty Potty: uh. Their marketing video doesn’t help.

I love the Victorian era. So I decided to live in it: uhh, a) I’m glad that these two found each other, b) they sound absolutely insufferable, and c) their story was written by her on a Web site that, by all rights, they should have no idea even exists. Of course they have their own Web site. Money line: “Not everyone necessarily wants to live the same lifestyle we have chosen, of course.” {via}

Currant Events: a blog dedicated to the goings-on of a MSNBC show’s plate of pastries. There’s also a Twitter account.

Fake A Baby: weird. {via}

Why drivers in China intentionally kill the pedestrians they hit: absolutely sickening. {via}

The World’s Best Travel Jacket: uhh, wanted $20K and got $8.7M with 10 hours left to go?! That is bananas!

Dismaland: I feel like they’ve really captured its essence.

Banksy Dismaland show revealed at Weston’s Tropicana: go visit nihilism-land and hate yourself!

At Amazon, Employees Treat the Bathroom as an Extension of the Office: never worked there but I’ve worked at places where people took and made calls from the bathroom.

Researcher makes himself into a GOAT with prosthetics to follow herd in the Alps: species is a social construction. “Funded by the government.” You don’t say! {via}

Vandals attack vacation home of dentist who killed Cecil: *smh*

How I Gave Up Alternating Current: perhaps unsurprising, the creator of Soylent is a kook. {via}

10 “Seinfeld” episodes that are racist and sexist in retrospect: an article about nothing. {via}

Velazquez v. City of Long Beach: Circuit Court decision provides a valuable piece of information (in footnote on last page of decision). Don’t express gratitude or temporal-based salutations in the courtroom of Rhode Island District Court Judge Smith. {via}

Wikipedian in Residence for Gender Equity: why is tuition so expensive? {via}

The NoPhone: did it make its funding goals? Of course it did.

Clever trick will safeguard Apple Watch from thieves: read the comments. “Great, now thieves will cut off people’s arms.” *rolls eyes* Love this response: “I can just imagine someone at Walmart trying to pay using the watch attached to a severed arm they brought in a plastic bag. No problem, have a nice day sir….”

UroClub: what the holy hell. “Created by a Board Certified Urologist?” Why is that relevant?!

What should I watch out for when fighting a chimpanzee?: HOLY FUCK!

Namez: it’s a good problem to attack, as I’m sure a huge portion of the population has difficult-to-pronounce names. However, it’s a longstanding problem that people have been working around for forever, no one would ever pay for this service, and people with hard-to-pronounce names are more likely to have thicker accents that make their recorded pronunciations hard to understand—compounding the problem.

Two Dollar Club: $15 for $10 worth of two dollar bills. At least the roll of quarters had some heft to it that might justify a premium. $5 to mail what would cost 44¢?! The bigger mystery to me is why someone would opt for $300/month plan (you get 100 $2 bills). Delivery by courier merits $100 over face value?

Washboard: $15/month for a $10 roll of quarters delivered automatically. One problem: the chronically lazy with more money than brains probably don’t schlep their clothes to a laundromat—they just buy new clothes.

Vessyl: this is an amazing technology that’s solving a problem no one has. “What am I drinking?” Read the bottle or can. “How much am I drinking?” Figure out how many ounces your glass is, make a tick mark (|) after each glass, and then multiply the tick marks by the number of ounces. “How many calories am I consuming?” Same thing, but read the bottle or can for the number of calories per serving. I just saved you $99 (preorder) or $199 (later).

Great Horror Campout: holy moly! I’d go for this except for the Tucker & Dale problem. Also, unstoppable music.

Inside Heiress Huguette Clark’s California Mansion, Frozen in Time for 60 Years: no one from the family has visited in sixty-one years.

Oprah Interested in Buying Clippers: “The Oracle chief has had basketball courts on at least two of his yachts, said Tom Ehman, who handles America’s Cup matters for Mr. Ellison. He said Mr. Ellison liked to relax by shooting hoops on these courts, and has had someone in a powerboat following the yacht to retrieve balls that go overboard.” Whoa.

Kim Jong-un executes security minister by FLAME THROWER: bloodthirsty dictators need to get creative to stay engaged. Mortar round? Come on, that’s the province of the bored.

S01E07 Miss Ping (Tumba Ping Pong Show): this was mystifying to me, until I found this video detailing how it’s done.

Tower Climbers working: so very, very hard to watch.

Buying Cheap Property In Detroit: I wondered about this. Sounds like a war zone.

Kidz Bop Kids – Thrift Shop Macklemore Cover: “This has more dislikes than views.”

Prancercise Highlights: wow. I’m just stunned. (It’s better with a unicorn mask.)

Riker sits down: given the height of those chairs, it seems pretty fluid but you’ll quickly notice that no one else does that.

Clear for Mac + Leap Motion: I don’t know. This seems like more work than clicking on a checkbox.

12 Letters That Didn’t Make the Alphabet: talk about dodging a bullet! English is difficult enough as it is—these guys would have made it dreadful.

Anonymous Attacks Westboro Baptist Church Over Plans to Picket Sandy Hook Funerals: something about “two wrongs” springs to mind. Free speech must still be defended, no matter how vile the speaker

Unusual baby names of 2012: I was going to say that there’s no way that anyone named their baby boy “Google” but nothing surprises me any longer when it comes to people.

American Baby Names Are Somehow Getting Even Worse: my name—Bill Brown—is so boring but I absolutely love the simplicity of two syllables.

Man completes triathlon – juggling: come on, only two balls while biking?! You can do better than that.

I might regret asking this, but Reddit break out those throwaway accounts because if you could be brutally honest with your SO what would you say?: yowza.

Fetus Soap: no, not something to clean your fetus. Just click. {via}