Baby Toupee: you can’t get ahead with no hair on your head. {via}

Top 176 Star Wars Lines Improved By Replacing A Word With “Pants”: the only good one is the first one, “I find your lack of pants disturbing.”

All Simpsons Episodes: this has got to be unauthorized. {via}

9 Months in 20 Seconds: man, I love these compressed-time videos. I think a cool one would be some dance move that takes years to create. {via}

Maricopa County Unidentified Persons Bureau: see anyone you know?

Trump Magazine: OMFG, *rolls eyes*. Does anyone actually devour this dreck?

Best Tips That No One Seems to Know About: awesome tips. I did not know that you could right-click in Firefox on a text box for a search on any site and one of the options would be to “Add a Keyword for this Search…” That is phenomenal.

Jesus Appears on Backside of Beloved Pet: wow, it’s a miracle! {via}

No Star: there’s a few new designs I’ve never seen before, but this oldie never fails to crack me up.

Hamster Ball: why indeed.

Jill Greenberg Photography: nice pictures but what an interface!

Colourful Coffins: may as well give your funeralgoers something to look at besides your dead mug.

The Marmaduke Project: the spectacularly boring Marmaduke comic strip reimagined and reinvigorated. Well, as much as it can be. {via}

How Well Do You Know …?: movie trivia quizzes to see how much you really remember about some classics. Dang, only 11 out of 20 on the Star Wars quiz.

Executed Offenders Last Statements: going back to 1982. Read what the doomed had to say. It would be really neat if it went back further still, but that’s probably unlikely from a bureaucracy.

Legalize Ferrets: I didn’t even know you could smoke them.

Wine Dogs: shining the spotlight on the dogs of Australia and New Zealand’s wineries because, well, umm, the cats kept running away? I honestly can’t fathom who would be interested in books or calendars of these dogs besides their owners who may be pretty wealthy from selling wine. Ahhh, I get it now.

Restless Legs Syndrome: I did not know there was such a disorder. Is it like they want to stop but they just can’t?

Golden Book of Chemistry Experiments Scan: this book has been banned, like so many useful chemistry sets, because kids can learn things from it. Its copyright wasn’t renewed when it should have been so it has fallen into the public domain. The torrent link in that entry appears to be wonky so here’s a non-Torrent local mirror.

[UPDATE (9/13/2007): Removed mirrored file. It appears to be in the public domain but not rightfully so.]

The Show: sponsored by Go Daddy for a day. Here’s hoping it’s the start of many sponsorships.

Watermelon Special Fruitcarving: wow, now that’s something.

Bossaball: new sport I’ve never heard of that’s a mix of “volleyball, gymnastics, soccer, and capoeira.” Checking out some of the videos has me completely befuddled.

Sky Ceilings: these are nice but I bet the effect wears off by night. They also do walls. {via}

Topless Sunbathing: caught on Google Earth. And that view is going to greet those people every time they open Google Earth. Ha ha. {via}

Ketchup Week: makes sense. That week is pretty much useless anyway.

T-Lists: you pick a category and then enter your top 5 options for it and they make a t-shirt out of it. Ugh, that doesn’t really explain it. Go there and you’ll catch on immediately.

FHM MINI: there’s other ad MINIs but that one jumped out at me. 🙂

Top Gear Mini Ski Jump: classic, of course. {via}

Business Bib: half a suit for those video conferences from home. At $135 per bib, comfort isn’t exactly cheap. Also, nothing for the ladies. {via}

HP Cameras Slimming Feature: watching this just disgusts me. I know this sort of thing can be (and likely is) done in Photoshop all the time, but I get so tired of this constant focus on how much body fat you have. Neither of the ladies in the demo look overweight, either. But I wonder if an “embiggen” feature would cause the same ruckus. {via}

International Talk Like a Pirate Day: in case ye be wonderin’ what in Davey Jones’ locker be goin’ on. Thanks be to Dougal for the landlubber’s Text Filter Suite that made this possible. Time for grog, arrrrr.

The Muppet Matrix: much better than the original. *ducks*

Office Poltergeist: Windows program for remote pranking. Now with a Firefox extension version as well!

Flickr Mini-Cards: 100 cards for $19.99. The back is a picture from your Flickr account (up to 100 different ones!) and the front is normal business card stuff. How awesome!

World Famous for Dicking Around: “amateur stuntmen” (aka Jackass rejects). No video anywhere I could find, but they’re on several American channels.

Annoying Coworker: anonymously email your coworkers about their annoying habits or behaviors. Wow, 153 pages of this so far.

Knork: clearly inspired by its cousin the spork, the knork is a knife and fork combination. Forgive me, but I can’t find the answer to “does it cut steak?” anywhere on the site.

How to Talk Like a Pirate: tomorrow’s the big day. {

White and Nerdy: “Weird Al”‘s new video that’s a parody of Chamillionaire’s “Ridin'” song. Amazingly, there’s a Wikipedia entry for the song already and it’s been edited 83 times. The album it’s from, Straight Outta Lynwood, isn’t due for another week. {via}

Transformers CGI Test: uhh, I rescind my earlier trepidation if this is how it’s going to be.

[UPDATE: Why, oh why, didn’t I click through!]

Male Restroom Etiquette: overall a good primer to whizzing, but it takes an odd turn at around 7 minutes.

Virtual Bubble Wrap: the manic mode is a nice addition to this classic. {via}

Leek Spin: uhh, I think I must be missing some vital piece of information here. Why is that lady twirling a leek? Why is a seemingly-Italian song playing in the background? Why did someone register this domain (at least they used Go Daddy)? {via}

Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art: I’m pretty sure that this “museum” only has a Web presence—I didn’t admission information or directions anywhere. {via}

Willard Wigan: micro-sculptor. Truly amazing sculptures like the Statue of Liberty in the eye of a needle. {via}

Shakespeare Searched: as the Bastard said, “I give heaven thanks I was not like to thee!” {via}

ListPic: a front-end to CraigsList that focuses exclusively on listings with photographs.

University of Phoenix Sucks: chock full of “insider information” and vitriol. Yum.

Oh, Don’t Forget: interesting SMS service that sends scheduled alerts via text messages. Free, I think. {via}

DailyLit: service that sends a chunk of literature you select to your email address on a daily basis. Kind of like an audio book but for the Outlook crowd. {via}

The IT Job Seeker’s Song: a little cheesy, but funny. {via}

Transformers 101: uh oh. I can’t believe Hollywood could mangle the spirit of Transformers so badly. Wait. Why didn’t I expect that? I guess I thought it would be something more like this but without the dancing.

The Tarako Cupie Girls: this, apparently, is wildfire in Japan. If you read the comments, you’ll find out that the enormous wigs are actually sacks of cod roe. Those weird little dolls they’re playing with are also cod roe with cherubic faces.

Joshua Norton: also known as “Norton I, Emperor of these United States and Protector of Mexico.” He was a bum in the 1860s that lived in San Francisco and whose eccentricity (to put it mildly) was revered in that young town.

Frank Lloyd Wright in Half-Life 2: a stroll through Fallingwater. This is an incredible use. {via}

McDonald’s Kung Fu: only in Japan would this sell milkshakes. {via}

List of television shows canceled after one episode: there are a lot of them. And not all of them were Fox properties—they typically let a great show last for one season before they kill it. {via}

Star Trek Karaoke: funny. {via}

Everyday: haunting (and slightly dizzying) video of self-photographs taken every day for six years. I think the haunting aspect is mostly due to the lack of facial expression changes in all the photos. {via}

Clear Checkbook: an online check register. Or as I like to call it, a solution looking for a problem. But over 320 are using it and it’s got Ajax. Bwahahah!

Google Search – confidential “do not distribute”: got to love this set of search results.

DIY Amazing Race: yours will probably be considerably scaled back.

ZIP Code Stats: fascinating demographic analysis by ZIP code.

Very Funny Ads: and they are, too.

Overheard in New York: absolute gem of a site that features actual conversations eavesdropped upon in the Big Apple. I now know there is such a thing as “party tits”. Regrettably.

10,000 Reasons Why Civilization is Doomed: close to being almost halfway there. Most, as you might expect, aren’t very thoughtful but there’s some gems in there.

Weird Meat: blog about one guy’s diverse and, frankly, bizarre culinary world journey.

Boss Bitching: some of these have got to be made up! Boss told an employee to have an abortion or be fired because she wasn’t married? And the lady stayed there long past maternity leave and a demotion? Come on. But, then again, maybe…

Riptionary: a surfing dictionary or glossary.

Is It Friday?: I like sites that are simple and just do one thing and do it well. No RSS feed, unfortunately. I think that’s because it relies on Javascript to provide the localization inherent in the question. Also, sister site Is It 5:30?.

Weird Fortune Cookies: these are as quirky as you’d expect (though some are clearly typographical errors) but I have to wonder how many are Photoshop creations.

Never Stop Watching This: um, I stopped.